Thats because the movie blows chunks.  Well, actually, if it did do that, it wouldnt be so bloody boring!
     The same thing would happen if we were stupid enough to book that hideous 2045 here: no one would survive!

     I see the point youre trying to make, but must disagree.
     Sure, Garen cant program too many lousy movies, but he usually makes it a point to schedule one or two.  For instance, in 2010, we were all forced to suffer through The Giant Gila Monster AND The Day the Sky Exploded AND The Lathe of Heaven AND Night of the Comet AND Night of the Creeps.  Thats so much cheese that Wallace & Gromit were prepared to move into the theatre!

     First of all, that movie is so bad that the closest it comes to "cheese" is the mould that grows on it after it's been left out of the fridge for about three years.
     Why would anyone want to resurrect that corpse?  Let it rot in the ground where it belongs!

     So, YOURE the one!  I'm surprised you havent died from ptomaine poisoning!

     Would we have wanted to?

     Folklore so successfully narcotized the audience that manufacturers of barbiturates are suing for patent infringement!
     But at least you didnt have to RUN the gall-blamed thing!

     I thought that was the banner of the Harvey Pekar's comic book, American Splendor.
     The problem with the Howard the Duck movie (besides the fact that it was god-awful, & contributing to its god-awfulness) was that it just ignored everything in the original comic that made the character popular in the first place.
     Howard the Duck was the creation of Steve Gerber (since deceased).  Gerber had been writing Man-Thing (a Swamp Thing knock-off), & Howard appeared in it one day, as part of a temporal dimensional shift of some sort.  The fans loved the cigar-chomping, short-tempered fowl, & Howard was spun off into a couple of back of the issue stories before getting his own title.  (The best of which was Hellcow, where a very thirsty vampire drinks the blood of a grazing cow, turning her into a vampire cow, who sprouts leathern wings & flies away crying, "HAHAHAHAHAMOOOOOOOOOOOOO.")

     For whatever reason, Howard lit a fire in Gerber's creativity, & he did the best work of his comic book career (he later went on to write children's TV cartoons, & in an interview he gave to The Comics Journal, poked so much fun at the rules governing what he could or could not write that Ive never forgotten what he said).  Over its tiny run, there was nothing going on the world at the time that Gerber wouldnt tackle & skewer.  He took aim at American politics (usually carefully avoided in all comic books, but especially at Marvel), at our culture, at (deliciously) the Reverend Sun-Yun Moon (also now deceased), with a Korean named the Reverend Joon-Moon Yuc (with his followers, the Yuccies), who, when Howard is mistaken for him ("Come with me, Mr Duck), shouts, "Yuc! Yuc!  I'M the second coming!  Hes just a stupid duck!!!"  Those comics were a hilarious breath of fresh air.

     None of what made the book work, NONE of it, was transferred to the movie, which is depressingly typical.
     So, Pogo, dont go defending the indefensible.  Walt Kelly would be annoyed.  "God is not dead, he is merely unemployed," indeed.  Deck the halls with Boston Charlie.
     Picked up volume 2 of the Fantagraphics Pogo reprint, BTW?